What is Self-(Not)Care of Educators

Self-efficacy is one's belief about their ability to perform a skill or task. In teaching, this task includes managing curriculum goals, pedagogy, student behavior, navigating overt and covert systems, and maintaining a sense of self outside of teaching. This chapter tells the story of one new teacher who ended her teacher preparation during the COVID-19 pandemic, taught her first year online, and is in the midst of a chaotic online/in-person second year. Her sense of self-efficacy is processed as she moves from student teacher to in-person teacher in an urban school district. The typical trauma her students had was amplified by the restraints of the pandemic and changing pedagogical formats. Her trials and tribulations provide a narrative of enthusiasm, frustration, exhaustion, and hope as her own self-efficacy is tested and realigned. Transformation often is not designed but occurs through resiliency for not only students but also teachers.